All Stations? Really??

Time is like public transport. Eventually you'll get where you need to, but it never pays attention to the timetable it's supposed to. Yes, this is similar to my 'Time is like a taxi' statement, but this is better. EVERY post I make is better than the previous, at least with regards to my analogies of things to Time. Also like public transport, they usually don't get you to exactly where you expected either, but it's a close fit. Like public transport, there's always those people that know where they want to go, but don't pay attention to the indicator board.

I'm a bit like that at the moment. There's different routes I can take... and by that I mean an alternate pronounciation... but there's some you know just aren't the right way. The awful shame with me, though, is I hate standing still. I'd rather take any step than none, even if I know it's one backwards. I once went to see a friend's band play at Annandale, and rather than wait 20-25 minutes for a bus, decided I would walk home instead.

The thing is, I know I'm getting closer to where I need to be. Seven months ago, I was a lot further. I was back living with my parents, had gone through the breakup of a relationship that sucked the life out of me like I was that yummy bit in the bone when you have lamb chops, and I was fairly broke. Even still, I was optimistic. Someone asked me how I was, and I said pretty crap, but I knew things would be better in the future. I didn't know how they'd get there (and inside I thought it was more like a year or two away, rather than the crazy TWO WEEK PERIOD in which it all happened), but I just knew.

Not a lot of that has changed, but the main one which I'm happy about, is I'm living on my own. While there's still a teensy bit for me to still sort out, it feels like things are getting closer to how they're supposed to be, at least at this particular point in time. It did feel like my train had been derailed back in February, but it turns out that was just pushing a Delorean to get me back to where I was supposed to be. Sure, it's a weird twisted version of what I thought would happen, but at the same time, it feels right.

I think the real kicker for me was today. I hung a painting up on the wall. It's not an exceptionally brilliant painting, but why it was special, is because that little crappy painting (my assessment - my friend who saw it lying around thought it was AMAZING)... is one I painted. You couldn't even see the numbers anymore or anything!

So, delays aside. Wrong stop aside. Insane fares aside. I'm here.

Well, nearly.

In the quick closing then reopening of an eye...

Time is like a bed. There's a lot more enjoyable things I could (hypothetically- the truth is far sadder, or far in excess of information than anybody wants) be using one for, but right now, I'd be happy to sleep. Unfortunately I'm on the train, and far too conscious about my personal space to shut my eyes. And what's worse is that every few seconds, my eyes just want to close AND THEY DO! But I have the world's best willpower when it comes to staying awake and anyone that says different is a liar and a cat. Yes, a cat. You know who you are!!

The positive thing is that I'm clearly having an effect on the people around me with this. I look around and see lots of others trying to stay awake, but obviously taking a cue from example as when they close their eyes, they reopen them a moment later. It's almost imperceiveable, but they're doing it. No, they're not winking- winking's only ONE eye, you idiot. I hope it catches on.

If you start doing this, I want royalties.

I'm still of the opinion I need a personal train, or at least carriage. I try to pick places as far away from people as I can, and without fail, they always come to me. Packed or empty, they know what they want, and they want me. Well BACK OFF! If I wanted strange people touching me, well... I'M strange. I'd be doing something more enjoyable.

Bizarrely, I'm also a touchy-feely person- No, it's not a continuation of the between the lines of the previous sentence. I just feel disturbed when somebody's in my personal space when I don't want them to be. It's the weird tap on the back thing that bugs me most. And I'm not alone in this- a quick survey showed nobody likes when you walk up to people and start touching them.

Well, almost nobody, but um.. we won't talk about that guy. *shudder*

It's not that I haven't been sleeping well, though. I mean I haven't been, but that's not why I feel like sleeping more. I just like my warmth, and while being warm during the course of the working day tends to make me feel suffocated, in a bed that's a good thing. NO, NOT BEING SUFFOCATED. Being suffocated is NEVER a good thing (that's free advice, use it wisely)

Oh, and since I can, here's a followup: My hair cut isn't really that bad. I just don't like it.

Destroying the Universe

Time is like a creepy guy on the train next to me right now. No matter how much you ignore the heavy breathing or narrowed-eye stare (oh god, why is he looking at me now?? Should I stop dictating this blog????).. No matter how much you ignore it, it will take you for a ride if you let it, and when it's done you'll think "No.. What happened to me?"

Seriously, this guy is kind of freaking me out a bit.

Oh shit, now another guy is staring at me, and I don't even have boobs!

So, about a month ago I started walking to random places. Not hugely random like bus-stop #2 on the 396's route (total coincidence- someone I don't stalk gets off there at 7:12 most every weeknight except Thursdays), but random places from my past. A little reminiscing, but also erasing. I walked past my old school, my old uni, my old man, my old work, and lots of places from memories. Some places didn't exist anymore, so I don't know how you could say I walked past them, but whatever dude, it's your story.

In a way it was like erasing the past, but then the universe ceased to exist so I fixeded it. I did delete bad karma, but also lamented lost opportunities. You shouldn't dwell in the past though, so I came back. But like this guy with a whisper-thin moustache and pungent rag, it does make you think about how quickly things can change.

Those places, while a part of me, are my past. They're gone now, and like my potential kidnapper, are best moved away from.

Now, the places I go might be the site of future memorable memories.

Anyway, signing off now. I have a sweet tooth, and apparently this guy has candy. See, I shouldn't be so judgemental.

~T